On why loving someone doesn’t necessarily make them the best choice for marriage
BY DUMEBI ONYEMAECHI
“I been married for 5 1/2 years and your thread is FACTS! The only thing that has sustained us is GOD and our deep rooted friendship that we invested in EARLY….getting to really know the good and the bad, the truth and the ugly,” a twitter user said in response to Toni’s tweets.
A twitter user, Toni had tweeted on what young people should consider before they walk down the aisle and her tweets has been applauded by many who also shared their experiences in their marriages.
According to Toni, even though love is the underlying factor for marriage, it takes more than love to sustain a marriage. She advises that people take their time to know their spouses before committing themselves to a forever journey with them.
It’s kinda nuts how our choice of wife/husband can totally change the outcome of our life. The person we choose to spend our life with could literally be the difference between a joy filled, productive and prosperous future or a miserable, unproductive and problematic one.
What’s scary is the fact that some people end up with the latter and thought they made the right choice when they said “I do”.
Even when we think we know, do we ever 100% know? People are forever evolving and the person we marry on day one could be very different on day 2000. I guess all we can do is our best when it comes to determining the true character and behaviours of people.
Writing about this makes me realise why it’s so important to take your time to really get to know people as best as you can. Writing this also makes me feel like although that feeling of ‘love’ is important, there are so many other things that need to be factored in.
– How do they handle conflict?
– Do you share similar values?
– How are their relationships with other people?
– What is their vision for their future?
– How do they manage crisis?
– What do they find joy in?
– Where do they show signs of dedication and consistency?
Feeling like you ‘love’ someone is great and all but loving someone doesn’t necessarily make them the best choice for marriage.woman.ng